Saturday, August 3, 2013

Convos with the kids Vol. II

Can we just not talk about my epic 7 in 7 failure and I'll share some weird things my kids said as a peace offering??  Mmmmk great.  Thanks.


Ava, while reading a book about children who don't want to eat their dinner: Mom, why don't those boys want to eat their dinner?
Me: Well, why didn't you want to eat your dinner tonight?
Ava: ...You're trying to trick me, you sniveling goose!!

Ava to Clare while they were playing: No, Clare. I'M going to be the mom because I'm 4 and you are 2 and you are just a child and I am in charge of my bones.
(Not really sure what that all means, but I guess she's technically correct...)

Ava, to Clare, who was screaming bloody murder: Clare, you may only scream like that if a bear is eating you or attacking you.
(That's the rule at our house.)

Ava, looking at her birthday banner on the wall: Mom, why isn't there an "F" on the happy birthday sign??
Me: Because there is no "F" in "happy birthday"...?
Ava: Yes there is!!  Listen!!  Happy BirFFFFFFFFFFday!!!

Ava: Daddy, how does God take us up to heaven?
Stephen: We don't know exactly.  It's a mystery.
Ava: I think Jesus uses his magic sparkles.
(Well, I guess we can't rule that out.)

Ava, after seeing my underwear in the laundry pile: MOM! Did you PEE in your panties???!!!
(No dear, that's not the only reason we wash our underwear...)

Clare has a few things to say these days too...

Clare: Mom!!!!!!! What it?? What from??? From what?? It what from!!! from??  What it from??!!!
Me: .....
Ummm....what it from..??
Clare: I fink it from Target!
Me: What's from Target?
Clare: ...I don't know ANYTHING!!! (Turns and runs away...)

Clare: I wike your toenails!!  They are orange!  I don't even have toenails.

Clare: Mommy, can you put on my strawberry shortcake pajamas??
Me: You don't have any strawberry shortcake pajamas.
Clare: Oh...could you buy some??
(Clare is not known for her subtle approach...)

Clare, sadly, while slumped over her "laptop" at the table: I didn't get any emails.
Me: Do you want me to send you an email?
Clare: YES!!!!!!!!!  When I'm older.

After greeting Stephen, who was carrying a pack of Mike's hard lemonade, at the door...

(And for the record, we have never ever let her have booze.)
(But 2 year olds apparently think it's hilarious to ask anyway.)

And sometimes they just have absurd conversations.

Ava, sitting RIGHT next to Clare, who was dropping food into her water glass: GROSS, CLARE!! GROSS!!!
Clare: What??
Ava: GROSS!!
Clare: What??
Clare: What??
Ava: You heard me, Clare!!!
Clare: No I didn't. I was eating!
Ava: (Sighs) Ok, I will only say it ONE MORE TIME.  GROSS, Clare.
Clare: What??
Ava: UH OH CLARE.  Now you've done it!!!!!!
(You keep on using that word...I do not think it means what you think it means...)

Ok I have devised a schedule for next week that I think will  realistically allow me to pull together at least 2 blog posts.  I think.  So - I will hopefully see you Wednesday for that what I'm reading post...